Guest Writer

Arriving at the World Series of Poker to play for the first time is one of the most exciting things you’re ever going to do in this life.

And the reality that EVERYONE in the entire world who knows how to play really excellent poker is here, and you have as much chance of winning as getting invited to a threesome by Brad and Angelina, doesn’t seem to matter.  People of all ages are here to take their shot.

No where is the evidence clearer that poker is a worldwide phenomenon than at the WSOP. And you have to laugh when you realize the reason for all of this was that some guy invented those little tiny cameras and stuck them into a card table.

So not only does seeing the hole cards make for some extraordinary drama, it also makes it possible for people to learn how to play without having to make embarrassing mistakes in front of other people in a casino.

So what does it say about out culture that the foundation for this seismic event is that average folks get to learn something new without having their self esteem bruised?

Yeah, I know, I can’t decide who’s prettier, Brad or Angelina, either.  If only she had his abs…, oh sorry, I wandered off a second there.

What we really haven’t looked at is why poker has become so popular.  I think it’s pretty simple, really.

The poker craze is the last gold rush.  The frontiers are all gone.  Mankind’s reach has extended from the ocean’s depths to outer space, and as the population of humans increases on this planet, what with the globalization of poverty and the coming oil wars, opportunities for grandeur and glory are hard to come by for the average man, or woman.

But not in poker.  It doesn’t matter when I sit down across from Phil Hellmuth that he has cashed 58 times in the WSOP and I haven’t won a dime, because right now, in this moment, he’s getting the same two cards that I am, and I have a chance. 

Chris Moneymaker showed the world what an average guy can do with just one chance.

At the WSOP it can be truly said that hope springs eternal.

And in a world where one person becomes increasingly irrelevant and powerless, where hope shrinks like George Bush’s gonads on a cold Iraqi night, poker gives the likes of you and me a vision of the American dream that we can call our own, and all for the price of an entry fee.

What’s that?  You don’t have ten thousand dollars?  And if you did and you spent it on a poker game your wife would thread needles through you’re eyelids while you sleep?  Knitting needles?

That’s why we got satellites, baby!  And I’m not talking about little spaceships that the NASA uses to count the nose hairs on Bin Laden's camel.  I’m talking about the little tournaments you can play in to win your way into the big tournaments.

For the price of one hour in the VIP room at The Spearmint Rhino, you can have the chance to go home with more than just a smile.

Tomorrow we’ll talk about satellites, your chance for a chance.